Addisons

Amazing! You have no idea how excited I was about the response from the last post. For those that don't follow me on Twitter and such, the last post drew in over 1,000 views into this blog. I looked all over and I could see other people posting my link in the web and talking about my views. I said that I didn't expect to get a huge crowd with it, but wow, you guys proved me wrong! Thank you so much! It really touched me to see that so many wanted to read what I had to say!

Alot of people mainly focused on what I had to say about Bishop Eddie Long. It was a prime example of my entire point. People were angered by him today as he stepped into the pulpit and denied the claims based on those 4 men. Some say he is guilty, but some say there isn't enough to prove. But one thing is for certain, which once again refers back to my las post, if he had just never spoken agains homosexuality, alot of people would have never paid attention to this. That's what you call taking more than you can chew!

But wow, I have no idea how I managed to put so many thoughts in my last post. How many was there? Too many for me to count. As you can tell, I had alot going through my head at the time. And you can tell I did not think about it long because it's all jumbled up. But seriously, I hope I made a point with it. Maybe some people will follow my lead.

To be truthful, my entire week has been rough. Sorry, maybe make that 2 weeks. School work continues to pile on itself. Work continues to get more complicated every day due to our new manager. My dad's recent health scare. Thankfully though, everything is fine. And another thing that has happened that may possibly bring my overall family together.

I can't say that I have taken a liking to my uncle the past few years. Not that he knows anything about this. I tend to keep my feelings toward him a secret. One side of my family just wants to keep the peace on some things. So why should I bring back old wounds? Not me, not I.

I won't go into the nitty gritty, because what happened is a soap opera in itself. Long story short, I was very close to him and vice versa. He got married, and eventually took actions based on accusations by her. I won't go into who it involved (it wasn't me personally) or what it involved, but his actions led me to loose respect and admiration in everything that he was and what he stood for. His actions also split that side of my family in half for 2 years because of it.

I had not seen him in person in over 2 years, nor did I want to. While it did not involve me, I felt just as betrayed and hurt. I also felt that it was so hipocritcal of him to act like that and in the 2 year hiatus, he becomes a very big figure in his church. While I am very religious, I felt that a confession in my front yard would have sufficed alot better.

They then proposed that we shared Christmas together after 2 long years. While the rest of my family agreed, I was dead set against it. But for my family's sake I agreed. Since then, I have put a fake front. The situation has improved some, but never will it be the same again.

Okay, to my point. Sunday he was rushed into the hospital for some known symptoms. Monday, he is diagnosed with Addisons disease. I really don't know how to really explain it, but I'll compare it to how your immune system is trashed after chemo. Apparently he has had this for some time, but just now diagnosed. He has been a basket case since then, along with my grandmother and who knows who else.

Now, don't say, "Wow, his cold heart really can bleed," when I say that I was really concerned about all of this. I wanted to go and be there for him during his hard time. But of course, school and work had a firm grip on me. He has since returned home, but his life will be altered forever.

So now I sit here with many emotions. And what kills me is that the entire time that I think of what horrible things he is going through, and all I want is to tell him how I feel that he betrayed me, my family, and how much I despise him for it.

Maybe I can make things better by continuing to be there for him during his health crisis. Hey, maybe even this will bring us closer, possibly. Or maybe my intention is to tell what I really want to say to get some closure...for the both of us.

All I know is that with everything going on right now, the only time I can escape reality is when I do my 6 minute commute to work, school and home every day.

-Tyler