Too Hard

First of all, thank you all so much for the 2,000 views!! You all are so supportive and amazing!!

For the past few days, I have looked outside and realizes that spring is fastly approaching. And after months of snow and freezing rain, spring is starting to be a happy feeling. I'm not the type of person that likes to look outside and see death in trees and the coldness in the air.

Now I am able to look outside and begin to see the rebirth of God's great work. I am a sort of environmentalist, so I get excited at the thought of a new tree planting its roots in the soft soil below it. I have a young peach tree in my back yard, and I am hopeful that it will bear fruit this year.

Now on to the shattered part. Last night, someone told me news about themselves that really shocked me to my core. There are tons of people that have told me many things that has made me shocked. But last night was one of the top ones.

Sometimes stuff like this really shows people who they really are. You start to see how reckless they are. How the are not remorseful for their actions, and don't even acknoledge the consequences that could very well lie ahead. You start to see the hypocricy in them. You start to see their true colors.

They asked me if what I learned changed my thoughts of them, and I said no. But that is a lie, now that I think about it. That is unfair to them, but when you are such a shock like that, it is kinda hard not to.

I have already started to begin the distancing process, even though it isn't good for either of us. But I have spent so much time trying not to lecturing people for their mistakes, that when I hear something like that, it is just better to not say anything at all.

Today I never felt so lonely. This person is such a big part of my life. Can I really forget what I know? Can I move on? I would like to say I could, but it is just too hard.